Bella waits until Mike has run out of things to say and is looking at her expectantly.
"I suspect," she says, "that actually dealing with the content of what you just said will be a thankless task, so let's address the consequences that have you so bothered. Hi, Mike. I'm Bella. Tell me something about yourself to justify the minutes of my life you just commandeered. Perhaps you are kind to animals or passionate about raising the minimum wage or talented at origami, I'm pretty flexible."
"...What?"
"You wanted to get to know each other. What's there to know about you? Do you have traits?"
"...Uh, I help out part time at my dad's sporting goods store -"
"Do you have interesting traits?"
"Um, I'm - in the band elective?"
"Congratulations, Mike. You might be able to hold a non-disastrous conversation at some time with some girl who cares at all about music, if you do more than just show up and count minutes in your band elective. But I don't care. Now I have gotten to know you and I am rejecting your company on its own merits. Go away."
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2014-05-21 06:01 am (UTC)"I suspect," she says, "that actually dealing with the content of what you just said will be a thankless task, so let's address the consequences that have you so bothered. Hi, Mike. I'm Bella. Tell me something about yourself to justify the minutes of my life you just commandeered. Perhaps you are kind to animals or passionate about raising the minimum wage or talented at origami, I'm pretty flexible."
"...What?"
"You wanted to get to know each other. What's there to know about you? Do you have traits?"
"...Uh, I help out part time at my dad's sporting goods store -"
"Do you have interesting traits?"
"Um, I'm - in the band elective?"
"Congratulations, Mike. You might be able to hold a non-disastrous conversation at some time with some girl who cares at all about music, if you do more than just show up and count minutes in your band elective. But I don't care. Now I have gotten to know you and I am rejecting your company on its own merits. Go away."
Mike splutters.